Okay, I made a blog, a blog like the rest of the internet. I set it up, I made it pretty then I fucked off and left it to die off in the internet wasteland, only to be found by googlers and weird people who click the next blog button. (Who actually uses that? Oh wait, that's me.)
Anyway, back to the matter at hand. On the 10th September 2014, I left a foggy and damp Southern Scottish address to make a 9112 mile journey to the other side of our large planet. I jumped into the car with my mum, dad and my not-so-little sister as they drove me 55 miles to Newcastle Airport. I then boarded, some four hours later, I got there quite early, a massive plane. The biggest I've ever been on, apart from the time we were given a Boeing-777 to fly to Alicante, which was weird. It was an Emirates flight and everything was lovely from the complimentary hot towel, to the complimentary penguin biscuits, to the complimentary single malt whisky. Needless to say, everything was complimentary. I arrived into the desert, also known as Dubai, at midnight on the 11th September 2014. It was about a million degrees and I had to thank my little brain for not agreeing to a year in a desert.
Three hours in Dubai International Airport was interesting to say the least, I traded some old US dollars for Dubai's lovely currency the dirham. I say it's lovely, that's because it has coffee pot like objects on the coins and is wonderfully unique. I ventured into Starbucks after finding myself with dirham and ordered a large cup of tea. Grabbed some sugar packets - it had been a long afternoon and headed off to find my gate and a seat, which I managed with some success. Opened the lid of my tea to reveal, dun dun dunnn... foamy hot milk on Earl Grey Tea. I'm not in Kansas anymore. My world is broader and stranger for this experience already. I drank my entirely wrong cup of tea while reading Last Bus to Woodstock by Colin Dexter, listening to two German backpackers being weird and a cute old couple telling an Australian gent about their English grandchildren. Dubai airport was wholly a success and I boarded the second flight a 2.10am and we set off on the second leg of my mammoth journey at 3am.
The food on the plane was odd, I must admit. Beef stew at 3.45am was bizarre to say the least, but it wasn't as bad as my error when eating an entire lox of salmon on an empty stomach almost led me into the bathroom to vomit. I survived that, thank Einstein. So, both flights went without a hitch and I arrived into Perth, WA at 5.30 on the 11th September 2014. A synonymous with so many horrid things, became a day I will always remember. It was the day my life changed, it was flipped upside down, thanks to the southern hemisphere and I will hopefully be a better person from it.
But, this is already too long, so for now... from the lovely view across the property I will disappear, I have some Jimmy Carr to watch.
Rx
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